Forget the bad.
As a mother, I tend to focus on the negativity of the day, not all the stuff that went right. Lately I've been feeling very stressed, I feel as if I have all these stressors on me all at one time: the lawn needs mowing, but how is it going to get done? The carpet in Marble's bedroom needs a severe cleaning, when will I find the time? The house needs cleaning, how do I do that with a child that needs my constant attention? There are plenty of other things, but we'll just leave it at that. The baby has a terrible habit of taking naps on me. This is the current habit I am trying to break with him. I am not having the best of luck with it. I get him down usually for naps, but then he only takes a 30 minute nap, which is a problem. It isn't a problem at that exact moment, but by 4 he is so tired he is screaming, crying, kicking, and inconsolable for a long time. I get incredibly irritated, tired, and stressed by this. It makes me not want to continue the sleep training for naps(we have night sleeping down quite well). Everyone tells me it will get better, but it is just so dang hard. I think I broke down crying twice today, I don't think I've cried in over a month.
Alright, now to celebrate all that has been going right. I do get him to take naps in his crib. I have been able to keep a presentable house for the past year by myself. I have exclusively breastfed our child for over 6 months now. I have taken care of a baby for the first time(I never babysat) all by myself for over 6 months. I have managed to do most of the household stuff on time(the oil needs changing in the car and that is overdue, oops). I have managed to join plenty of mom's groups so our son gets plenty of interaction with other children and he loves being around other people! I get our son to sleep usually 11 hours straight at night. I went to a Marilyn Manson concert by myself. Overall, I'd have to say I've done quite good for myself the past year. I will say this though, the month of May can finish up already, I'm ready to hug my husband again. After he gets back, I don't want to hold a conversation over instant messenger ever again! I love my husband, my child, and my life, and myself.
